


¿me comprastes las paletas que te pedí?

by cityskin



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Hispanic Jason, Texting, dick is impulsive and forgetful, everybody is on speaking terms au, jason actually lives at the manor au, they keep stealing jays food
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-06-17
Packaged: 2019-05-24 12:58:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14955132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cityskin/pseuds/cityskin
Summary: Dick is out running errands while Jason texts him.





	¿me comprastes las paletas que te pedí?

**Author's Note:**

> [Pinche Grosero] is Jason  
> [DiscoWing] is Dick  
> [Little Prince] is Damian

  
[Pinche Grosero]: dick are you at the store yet???  
  
[DiscoWing]: Yeah, whats up?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: me compras unas paletas porfa  
  
[DiscoWing]: Okay.  
  
[DiscoWing]: What flavor though?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: limón and fresa cuz cass wants some too  
  
[DiscoWing]: Omw.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: btw do u kno whos been stealing my hot pockets? i know alfred wont throw them away cuz he actually likes me @ the manor so that leaves everybody else  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: mind buying me another box of cheese hot pockets??  
  
[DiscoWing]: Okay.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: like steph and cass leaves me notes. steph with how much food she took and cass a cute ass puppy drawing  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: have u seen them i have like 8 of them  
  
[DiscoWing]: Well, who is in your current list of suspects?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: bruce, dames, roy  
  
[DiscoWing]: Roy?????? As in Roy Harper?????????  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: yeah he a bitch  
  
[DiscoWing]: I don't think he would go out of his way to come all the way to Gotham to steal YOUR hot pockets in YOUR home jaybird.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: he would tho  
  
[DiscoWing]: He would, but I'll talk to Damian right now and see whats up.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: all right ttyl  
  
  
......  
  
  
[DiscoWing]: Heard you were eating Jason's food without his permission.  
  
[Little Prince]: With what evidence do you have to back up this ridiculous claim?  
  
[DiscoWing]: a witnesses  
  
[Little Prince]: Fake news. I would never eat Todd's disgusting cheese pizza sleves even if I was faced with starvation.  
  
[DiscoWing]: Objection! I didn't say anything about hot pockets!!!!!!!  
  
[Little Prince]: Is that what they are called? It sounds stupid.  
  
[Little Prince]: Plus, the "hot pockets" are the only food items he has in the refrigerator! He has only dropped by three times last month, so what would be the point of letting them go to waste?  
  
[DiscoWing]: They dont spoil so quickly Dami, they can be in there for years.  
  
[Little Prince]: Gross.  
  
[DiscoWing]: Go confess your sins to Jason and ask for his mercy.  
  
[Little Prince]: No.  
  
[DiscoWing]: I can't protect you when Jason finds out it's you and he tells on Alfred.  
  
[DiscoWing]: You know damn well Jason is the favorite grandson.  
  
[Little Prince]: I'll consider my options.  
  
  
........  
  
  
[DiscoWing]: lol guess what  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: its dames?  
  
[DiscoWing]: Haha yep  
  
[DiscoWing]: What are you planning to do to get back at him?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: gonna eat all the vegan shit in the house and restock the place with meat  
  
[DiscoWing]: I can't get your list of revenge if that's what you're implying. I only have $46 in my bank account.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: yo when the fuck did u get so broke lmao  
  
[DiscoWing]: bought a $200 acoustic guitar last night  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: YOU FUCKING WHAT  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: DICK WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT  
  
[DiscoWing]: I want to learn how to play!!!!!! Don't hate me!!!!!  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: PENDEJO A QUE HORAS VAS A TOCAR LA PUTA GUITARRA  
  
[DiscoWing]: CUANDO SE ME DA LAS PUTAS GANAS OJETE CHINGA TU MADRE  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: just return the guitar  
  
[DiscoWing]: Cant.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: what do u mean u cant???????  
  
[DiscoWing]: The Guitar Center cashier was really hot. I'd disappoint him.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: hot or not dude go return it  
  
[DiscoWing]: Noooooo I actually wanna learn! Let me have this impulsive buy and let me live asshole!  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: whatever  
  
[DiscoWing]: Im at the register. Need anything else before I go?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: XXL condoms pls roy is coming over  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: gonna pipe him so good  
  
[DiscoWing]: He bringing Lian over?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: yeah im hoping bruce is gonna take the bait and offer to take care of her tonight  
  
[DiscoWing]: Well it has worked every single time.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: hope it works tonight cuz roy needs a break  
  
[DiscoWing]: You can have my bed for the night I won't be sleeping until late.  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: nah roy and i can share  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: wouldnt be the first time  
  
[DiscoWing]: Ew, why don't you marry him while you're at it?  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: omw  
  
[DiscoWing]: Hahaha good luck with that, I'll text you in a bit so you can help me with the groceries.  
  
  
......  
  
  
[DiscoWing]: I'm here  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: helllll yeah!!! omw  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: me comprastes las paletas que te pedí verdad  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: lian wants some of that good SUCC  
  
[DiscoWing]: Fuck  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: you forget didnt you  
  
[DiscoWing]: I got distracted!!!!!  
  
[DiscoWing]: I was about to grab them when you started with your hot pocket bullshit!!!!!  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: como digas ricardo  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: just kno youll be the one breaking the news to lian the terrifying five year old  
  
[Pinche Grosero]: :)  
  
[DiscoWing]: :(  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I won't give yall translations. this is for my hispanic homies they dont deserve google translated bs
> 
> Also im posting this from my phone so if theres mistakes my b


End file.
